Five Simple Steps to Change Your Life
You know change is needed in your life. You've known for a while now.
These are changes you've intended to make for years.
Let me help expedite your process by providing what I’ve learned over the past five years of sobriety.
Biologically, our brains mirror nature: we are physiologically designed to repeat patterns.
The Universe loves cycles: seasons, planetary orbits, the circle of life. Everywhere you look you’ll see repetitive patterns.
However, as humans, we are the only organisms in the galaxy that possess the ability to observe ourselves (consciousness).
We not only have the power of awareness, but free will takes that one step further. Once observed, patterns can be altered by empowered decision-making.
When we stop observing, even for a moment, the magnetic pull of universal law takes over by default. Our physical nature will always be drawn back to cycles.
Early in our development, our brains were the most elastic--a clean slate--ready to record patterns. Imagine your tender brain as a vinyl record, deep circular patterns being carved into it by the needle of external stimulation. These were the original imprints that formed your worldview, your beliefs, your personality.
The brain functions as a mechanical machine, fighting to maintain these imprinted cycles. Therefore, it doesn’t differentiate between positive and negative outcomes. It just knows patterns and will follow the same one for eternity.
When we embark to change these innate imprints, it can feel overwhelming. We are essentially negotiating with ourselves.
But, through my own experience, I’ve devised some manageable steps to at least begin the process.
Quitting crystal meth was a habitual pattern that I had to break. I’m here to tell you that it was easy to stop using meth compared to the process of changing the beliefs that had been carved into that vinyl record brain of mine.
I receive many accolades for being able to stop the daily injection of crystal meth. Truth is, I had to make that decision or go to prison. If only we were faced with leveraged decisions like that when it comes to daily thought processes; the sense of urgency would be intensified!
The hard work for me began after the substance was removed. I was left to unravel the patterns that drove my life to addiction in the first place.
It has been a five-year journey of peeling back decades of habitual thinking and behaving.
I felt overwhelmed and discouraged for a long time. And if you feel the same way, I hope that through my own trial-and-error, your learning curve will be softened.
Get specific.
Many people know they want to change but aren’t able to articulate how.
I hear people say “I just want to be a better person.” What does that mean?
Clear beginning and ending points are the foundations for this journey back to self (before your brain was etched with cycles).
I wrote a long, detailed description of my best self asking what would I be like in every aspect of my life if I was the highest version of myself.
The next step to this is to create mental scenes of these future aspects, feeling the emotion of having them become reality. Emotion is the conduit to moving our dreams into our reality.
Joe Dispenza calls it Remembering Our Future.
Neutralize I AM.
Begin paying attention to your language.
Notice when you attach your identity to your habits and behavior. For example, replace “I am a procrastinator” with “Parts of me like to procrastinate”.
This will soften feelings of guilt and separate your true nature from the habit.
You are NOT your behavior.
You are NOT your emotions.
You are NOT your habits.
You are NOT your past.
I recently made a guided meditation for detachment if interested. Click HERE.
Practice Awareness.
Now that the habit is detached, begin to examine it through self-observation.
The light of awareness doesn’t eliminate the habit, but it does expose it, which diffuses its power over you and your emotions.
Objective observation says “I see that parts of me are acting out right now. Let’s see if we can figure out where that’s coming from? Which cycle is my brain trying to repeat?”.
Triggers Offer Direction.
Monitor emotional triggers because these are indicators of where to begin deep observation.
When we are activated, that emotion is your brain’s way of saying “This feels familiar and you are unsafe. We need to stay on track with this belief!”
For example, your team member at work questions your authority and it causes anger to well up. The belief that you have to be perfect may be at play here. The anger is both keeping you locked inside this belief but also indirectly inviting you to heal.
If negative emotions like anger are fed energy instead of being observed (there is a fine line there), they will prohibit the process.
For a free download to help with this process, see my Quick Guide for Overwriting Limiting Beliefs below:
Set small goals.
Retraining the reptile brain can be a slow process.
Setting very small goals and anchoring into their achievement builds self-trust.
For example, if you allowed yourself to procrastinate once in the past, the brain is going to fight to keep that cycle going. Since we are referring to the animalistic reptile brain, think about a dog who is allowed human food once. It will always try to get human food for the rest of its life.
One small decision to take action despite your brain telling you not to can disrupt the cycle dramatically.
Take a moment and ask “Who is in control of my life?”
If the answer isn’t a full “ME” then your reptile brain has control by default.
The brain is fighting to keep the cycle the same, to hold you captive, to keep itself comfortable.
Consciousness allows you to change the patterns.
Most of us try but end up giving up at the first signs of defeat.
If a meth addict can regain control of their life, then you can too.
Love to all!
Dr. Dallas
Responses